As a Stay at Home mom, I have learned to be resourceful and economical with many parts of our lives. Before kids, we ate out whenever we wanted to, within reason, and went out after 7pm without having to worry about finding a babysitter, i.e. a family member who lives an hour and a half away. With this new found resourcefulness, I had realized that my almost 14 month old daughter has never had anyone but a member of our family care for her while we were out. Well, her life and mine was about to change forever.

Of course, drama ensues…It was Easter weekend and the last time that I went to church was went we got Luci baptized (last June). Well, we were heading to my mom’s house and I was well aware for days before hand that we were going to church and that I would have to leave the baby in the nursery. My heart stopped just thinking about leaving her even for more than ten minutes without me there as a safety net in case she got scared because another baby took a toy from her. Being an only child, she rarely has to share her toys or me for that matter, so I couldn’t stop coming up with scenarios in my head which would have me leaving the service just to check on her to make sure that everything was ok.

When we dropped her off, she was a little tentative about letting someone else carry her into the room, which I was expecting. So I went in with her and sat down and played a little bit until another baby came along and played with her. It was all over from there. One of the helpers sat down and played with them and it was like I was invisible. So I said my goodbyes and left. During Church, I had the urge to turn around and look at the clock every 10 minutes or so just to see how much more time I would have to be away from my baby. They never came and got me. After the service, John and I went to get her and they said she did great. She played well with the other kids and walked circles around them with her fast walking and running.

In the end, I knew that it was good for me to be able to let her be cared for by other people and to know that she does just fine in these situations. It always seems that the parent is always a little more anxious than the kids because they anticipate the screaming and crying. I made sure that I didn’t project my anxiety onto her and I’m hoping that is why she went in there with an open heart and mind.